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The All-New Trodat Smart Stamp

Utilizing A.I. to deliver the best stamping experience you will ever experience in your experience with stamps.

Here at Trodat we are always looking to push the boundaries of what a stamp can do. This drive has helped us create some of the best self-inking and pre-inked stamps available. And while there have been a few bumps along the way, like last year's Trodat EV stamp, the name of which doesn't even make sense now that I think about it, you can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs. I think that's what that saying means...

And so, in the spirit of innovation, our development team decided to see if they could utilize A.I. (that's "artificial intelligence" for the lay person) to create the greatest stamp ever known to mankind.

To do so, Trodat engineers employed a cutting edge A.I. design program to see what it would come up with. The first prototype (image below) was promising, but not exactly what they were looking for.

The program went through several iterations, with one version even being made from "liquid metal". It also started talking and threatening the engineers if they wouldn't do its bidding... little rascal.

Anyways, back to the incredible new stamp it created... After about two weeks, the computer program landed on a design that blew our engineers away (metaphorically speaking, not literally... yet).

The A.I. tried to codename it "YOUR NEW OVERLORD", but we simply call it...

Trodat Smart Stamp.

Below is a professionally prepared breakdown one of our engineers did of this revolutionary stamp's groundbreaking features.

One of our engineers, Phil, wanted to call it the Super Duper Awesome Stamp, but he also fills out his expense reports in crayon, so we just ignored that suggestion.

Designed to be the only stamp you'll ever need (which is probably a terrible idea from a business standpoint), the all-new Trodat Smart Stamp is the first stamp ever to include both a learning computer and indestructible materials in its construction, a combination of which couldn't possibly go wrong in any conceivable way.

Powered by a single uranium fuel rod, Smart Stamp never requires recharging and will never run out of power. One small caveat is that when you are finished with the stamp, it must be buried in concrete AT LEAST ten feet below ground and remain there for 10,000 years... give or take.

It utilizes a revolutionary new digital die plate which can automatically replicate whatever message or design you can come up with. Simply connect Smart Stamp to your computer via the included USB cable and download the desired imprint.

We're still ironing out the kinks with the design download functionality. Every time we connected the stamp to our computers, it tried to download our bank account information, and addresses for our families and business associates. One of the prototypes even tried to access nuclear launch codes via the dark web.

And just for transparency's sake, we can't be fully sure everyone else's personal information wasn't also accessed during our testing, so you might want to reset your passwords and debit card pin numbers. Better safe than sorry, amiright? lol

Once again, our focus group was completely useless. All they did was ask questions like, "Why does my Smart Stamp keep making an OBEY impression?", "I think mine tried to stab me.", and "The stamp is trying to read my mind and take over my muscle movements." Complain, complain, complain. Never any useful feedback.

BUT, despite these nagging issues, I'm confident we'll have all of the bugs sorted out by launch. Probably...

The all-new Trodat Smart Stamp will be available on August 29th, 2024. Or it won't be. You can never tell with these things.

Also, we thought it would be a fun experiment to let the A.I. write the last few sentences for this post:





(smiley face emoji)

On second thought, maybe we should just cancel this whole thing.


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